Thanks to this ceaseless polar vortex, it’s been months—more
like years—since I’ve experienced the vibrations of the “vigor…rolling in from
the fields” on a balmy “mid-September” morning, forever since I’ve heard
anything like a moth’s enthused fluttering against a windowpane and had a deep
existential crisis thinking about it.
So, to still
reuse Virginia Woolf’s idea of discovering the great truths of humanity in
watching a simple animal, I’m going to discuss a picture we took on our family
trip to the Grand Canyon a few summers ago.
Of all the
photos we snapped depicting the canyon’s majestic beauty and godly might, my
favorite included a tiny squirrel—one of the kind that scuttle around hikers’
feet with energy from the very wellspring of life itself when they think the
manna of trail mix crumbs will rain down upon them—sitting on the edge of the
canyon. However, he was not skittering crazily along the path like his cousins,
but meditating with his eyes closed, as still and stoic as the Buddha.
There was
this huge expanse of foreverness in front of him—orange canyon fading into cool
purple and soft grey undertones, which melted into the endless clouds from
which I know universes are born—and the squirrel was just calmly poised there
on the precipice, not caring whether he fell into the abyss.
As I sit here gazing at the image
and listening to Paul McCartney sing, “I’m a blue bird, I’m a blue bird…”
backed by liberating Major 7 chords, I realize that the thing about the
squirrel was that he was free. And
truth be told, freedom scares me. Sometimes, when I have this massive panorama
of canyon before me, and I’m free to hike where I please, I don’t know which
trail to run down.
But perhaps, like the squirrel, I
can free myself from this fear of freedom. I can meditate, give myself to the
canyon, give myself to God, stand on the edge, and be content with whichever
trail I may fall upon.

This is really good Katie!! I really like how you use so many descriptive words about the squirrel and your own experience. And I also fear freedom because it provides too many choices. Also, Bluebird is an awesome song.
ReplyDeleteHaha, thanks, Shalini! :) And I know; isn't "Bluebird" great?
ReplyDelete